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Tony Riccotoni Macaroni Balogna Maroni
Tony Riccotoni Macaroni Balogna Maroni, is one of the most influential members of the Italian Empire, and an anointed leader within the Maroni Clan. He is well known for his pivotal roles in many important undercover missions for the Empire involving secrecy and deception. Tony was also granted immortality by the God of the Multiverse, Marn Heirogryph. Biography Before the Empire Tony was born in Italy, on Earth 616 just fifty years following the Great Flood. First hand witnesses claim that Tony yeeted out of the womb with a lit cigar in his mouth and a 44 Revolver in his hand. The first thing Tony decided to do after his birth was go to a bar to get drunk on Irish whiskey. Everything was going fine until the two and a half hour old Tony engaged in a drunken fist fight with a time traveling baby, earning him his first misdemeanor. When Tony was ten years of age, he broke out of a maximum security prison, but not before brutally murdering all stationed guards within the facility. This amazing feat prompted the attention of infamous Mafia members Don Brody Maroni, and Jacob Maroni. Tony was contacted by the Empire and was scheduled for an interview with the Don Ferguson, Don Brody, Jacob Maroni, and numerous other higher ups within the Imperial ranks. All in all it was less an interview and more just a heated argument between both factions over which side of the Empire Tony should join. The dispute turned sour and seventeen lives were lost. Tony, seeing that more Ferguson men died, elected to join the winning clan. Later on that night, the Empire would celebrate his welcome with a fish fry, during with Marn, Fred, and Oobi Doob Scooby Dooby Benubi showed up with hash brownies. At some point during the event, Marn gifted Tony the enchantment of immortality, as well as boost his overall powers. Expanding the Empire It was about three hundred years after Tony's start in the Italian Empire, and he was currently out on an extermination mission with Brody. Some schmucks had the gall to double cross a contingent of Maroni drug dealers, and then make off with the goods. Luckily the Empire is resourceful, and the Maroni gang was able to figure out the thief's location, which meant revenge would be dealt. They were hiding out on a moon of Saturn, and instead of rooting them out, they instead just blew up the moon altogether. Pleased with their work, they headed back to Earth with the intention of getting drunk in celebration. When they arrived to, Jacob greeted and informed them of a discovery he made while wandering around in the forest. He said that he accidentally discovered a rift that led to some other universe, and that there many Gar-sensitive beings there. Brody congratulated Jacob on his discovery, and together they leaped through the rift to search the planet on the other side, but not before tasking Tony with giving words to all the higher-ups and made men. After Jacob and Brody returned, they were pleased to see that Tony did his job, everyone was properly informed, Tony even got Don Ferguson to come and share in the joyous occasion. It was then, when Tony realized that Conker hadn't shown up like he was suppose to, so he just yelled his name repeatedly until he came. With the crew all assembled, it was time to infiltrate Coruscant. When Tony arrived on the other side, he was given order by Brody to gather his best men so that they could go kill the natives and steal their star ships. Tony complied, and so he gathered as many men as he could and hit the streets. At some point during the coruscant attacks, Tony abandoned his mission to go get laid. His search for clit brought him all the way down to Level 1312 of the coruscant underworld, where he was greeted by a Rodian lady of the night, who actually turned out to be an ancestor of Greedo. He was led to cheap hotel where the dirty work would be conceived. However, before Tony could reach first base, he passed out due to the poison that was placed in his alcoholic beverage. He awoke several hours later without his wallet, cigars, and without his clothes. Enraged, he went on murderous rampage that lasted many hours. His bloodlust didn't cease until he realized he was killing Ferguson men. Snapped back to reality, he took out the remainder of witnesses, and donned some much needed clothes. Tony returned to the Maroni hideout, where he told Jacob that his mission was a total success. Jacob, easily able to detect his deception, told him to march back to the palace, where he would receive three weeks of torture without rest.